With his venom
And bittersweet
That loosener of limbs, love
Strikes me down.

—Sappho, With His Venom

Pills & Potions

The main determinants of sexual success are physical attractiveness, being the right age, having the right qualities, plus generosity of spirit and a sense of adventure.

There are many proposed treatments for low libido and impotence, from crushed flower petals to garlic, black pepper, licorice, arsenic, crushed peacock bone, vulture flesh, human ash, and monkey shit, whether ingested, smeared on the body, used as eye makeup, or applied to the genitals.

Similarly, there are many recipes and techniques that are supposed to enlarge or reduce the size of the cock or pussy, render people insane, objects invisible, turn lead to gold, make you live forever, or, more prosaically, color your gray hair brown.

If you’re going to try out such techniques, make potions palatable by dissolving or emulsifying them in warm milk and honey or warm milk and butter, and make ointments unguent by mixing them with honey or oil. You could do worse than a lubricant placebo. Good luck!

Scientists, magicians
Gurus, pharmacists
Quacks, physicians
All dispense advice.

Beware! Avoid stuff
That’s lethal, toxic
Socially disgusting
Or of dubious origin.

Listen to doctors
Friends you can trust
Qualified practitioners
Your own good sense.

Dildos & Sex Aids

If your sexual energy is low, your partner is wanting to get it on, and you can’t get wet or hard, whether because of age, poor lifestyle, substance abuse, or previous exertions, ask your partner to use their hand or mouth to get you going or do the same for them.

Also: consider using dildos or other sex aids.

Dildos may be made of rubber, silicone, metal, wood, bone, plastic or any other substance.

Babhravya says: ‘Metal ones are the best because they have a pleasant coldness, hardness, and weight, and hence can produce a violent response in the recipient.’

Vatsyayana says: ‘The best dildos are those that feel most natural.’

Dildos may be of any size, from tiny to massive, depending on the hole you’re trying to fill or the size of the cock you want it to contain.

Dildos may be smooth to the touch or rendered rough by ridges, bumps or indentations on their surface.

If you’re using it as a strap-on, you’ll need two straps to hold it in place; three, if it’s large. On a woman, these will need to fasten around the hips. On a man, they can also be attached to the balls.

In the absence of a well-fashioned device, you can improvise by attaching a well-lubricated vegetable or other object to a belt.

In some cultures, genital piercings are practiced. After piercing, you need to apply antiseptic – e.g. licorice mixed with honey – to keep the area clean and uninfected. You can insert a metal bar or some other device to enlarge the hole after piercing.

Hoops, crescents, bars that are circular, square or octagonal in cross-section, or any other shape of jewelry, may then be inserted. The material may be soft, like leather, or hard, like bone or metal.


Having studied ancient texts
Observed their application
Vatsyayana attempted
To concentrate their gist.

Enlightened people
Understand the import
Of purpose and power
And bridle their passion.

Occult practices and
Unusual techniques
Have been portrayed but
Need not be observed.

That someone somewhere
Likes doing something
Does not license its
Worldwide application.

Vatsyayana himself
Listened to Babhravya
Consulted his forerunners
Then made up his own mind.

Between the sexlessness of youth
And the serenity of senescence
One must eschew a path
Of unchecked sensuality.

If you cherish success
In love, life and riches
Study this text
But master your senses.

Smart people pursue
Meaningful projects
With long term loving partners
Not fucking all & sundry.